This morning, I broke off from conference proceedings and went to the post office. Fortunately, there is a "correos", as they say, a few minutes' walk from the hotel...
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I am occasionally capable of getting my act together and having some good ideas, and that was why I decided to make the most of my baggage allowance for this trip by packing up a box of belongings in terra smaller to send home to London in advance of the final exodus in eleven days. I bought a box from a post office in Singapore, filled it to capacity and brought it to Spain in my suitcase. And I decided to send it to the UK from here in the expectation that it should be substantially cheaper than sending it from the Lion City. This would also reduce the burden on my baggage allowance next week, when the stakes will be much higher!
I thought it was a brilliant idea in theory, but of course it went as smoothly as a car crash. Several communication breakdowns ensued as I tried to figure out what the words on the postal form meant. Apparently, "C. /" is some kind of code for "destination address". There was a box asking for "Empresa", and I was almost tempted to write "Nicola Sturgeon" before I managed to get Google up and translate it to "company" (I marked it as "N/A" before realising that that wouldn't help at all, whereupon I concluded that striking through the box was the only viable option). The lady at the counter was very animated, in true Mediterranean spirit (I'm reminded of Penelope Cruz's hurricane of a performance in 'Vicky Cristina Barcelona'). She refused to accept the Singapore Post-emblazoned box on the grounds of "propaganda", and I got her gist when I heard that word, so I pointed to the roll of packing tape behind her, and we set to work hiding the offending Singaporean "propaganda" while I gesticulated wildly to apologise for my lack of Spanish. (I think gesticulating wildly is a sign of diplomacy in Mediterranean countries.) When I got to the box asking for descriptions of the contents, I thought I would be there all day. But I managed to blag something about books and clothes with the aid of Google. My signature is the same in Spanish as in English, so that was a consolation victory at the end of the process. Then I handed over €50.83. I think that was the cheapest option, but I will honestly never know.
I sent my mum a message to let her know to expect a "parcel of belongings" from Spain, but my phone autocorrected it to a "parcel of bongos".
Just another typical morning. Everything is fine.
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By:
The Imperial Orange,
26th September 2017
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